ShatteredMinds

So, I just finished the game Call of Duty 4, and on the way to the seeing the kinda meh credits, it wasn’t all dandy. It got its laughable and frustrating moments.
The intro level (not the silly training) was really original with you being the hostage, President Derkaderk something, being dragged and driven through the streets of a terrorist-controlled area in the middle-east. You get executed. “Piss, what a short game” the pessimist might say. But after that you take the role of a SAS doucebag named Cillit Bang … sorry I mean Soap. Then you blast baddies, and the same thing is when you switch to the USMC-dude Pvt.Jackoff Jackson in the US-levels. And it goes on and on like this.

So at times in the game, you will get attacked by dogs. And they think your face is a fat juicy steak. This is where you’ll get frustrated, as the game tells you to smash your melee-button to kill the god damn dog, but it won’t let you. Should just say “Press V to shit your pants“. And then you die, as dogfood. The grenade indicators are also a bitch sometimes, not showing up on the HUD until the nanosecond before they explode right under your scrotum.

On the sniper-mission where you take the role as Cpt.Price 15 years earlier from present day, stealth is everything. Stealth goes overboard here. You crawl through a grassy field with enemies approaching with BMPs and shit, and you can just crawl right by their feet and the terrorists are too dumb to actually notice a huge ass bush crawling by. Same thing when you crawl under their vehicles on an asphalt road, after you’ve sprinted right by them without a soul even noticing a tree just jumped between some crates. While crawling under their trucks, no one takes notice you two human hedges (yeah, some dork orders you around on this level), clearly visible for anyone. But not in this game, no no. Logic out the window! And then your so called team-mate sort of just trip when you shoot down a helicopter and bitch he can’t move his legs, so you got to carry him around like a sack of potatoes.

Now came the part which irritated me: You carry your whiny mate around and you drop him and pick him up with the Use-key. Suddenly dogs and towelheads appear, and you desperatly smash the Use-key to drop your sack of useless meat to counter-attack, but the game won’t let you unless there is space for you two to make out. Oh crap, dog bit your testicles off and the terrorists
shove a grenade down your throat, while you were hammering the Use-key.

Speaking of grenades, the bounce-sound for grenades have not changed at all since the first Call of Duty, and you still throw like a sissy. And I have this feeling a lot of sound is re-used, and weapons lack that certain -mmpff-, like they sound weak.

All in all, I found the singleplayer-campaign short, but there is a ton of different weapons to pick up here and there, dropped by enemies or found in weaponcaches. The AC-10 bombing mission was awesome though, shooting tons of baddies from the air, using heat-vision.